I am holding it together. Holding being the operative word.
As in, I am actively ensuring that I do not fall apart.
It’s been a while since I’ve felt like this.
I started writing ThePath in January, when I realized I didn’t have an ounce of resilience in me. Since then, I’ve grown a lot.
And in scale, I am holding it together much better now. Nearly a year later, and right now I’m dealing with far more stress, and much higher consequence.
Maybe I’ve grown? Maybe my priorities have shifted some things are less intrusive than others. And maybe it’s a bit of both.
Regardless, this is the first moment in a long time where I’m having to fight to hold it together.
I’m taking deep breaths, holding myself back from lashing out. I’m reading and writing, thinking and talking.
I’ve got a 3-2-1 rule. 3 deep breaths, 2 things I’m thankful for and 1 reminder that I’m going to be ok.
It’s good. It helps.
When I remember to do it.
I’m reminded of Seneca, “The special characteristic of a great person is to triumph over the disaster and panic of human life.”
With perspective, I’m reminded that there’s no disaster in my life.
Panic?
Sure.
Disaster?
No way.
That’s where I’m at. I’m holding it together. I hope you are too.